I offer for your consideration – hi·ber·na·tion (hī′bər-nā′shən). Hibernation by definition is a periodic state of rest for the mind and body, in which the eyes usually close and consciousness is completely or partially suspended, protecting animals from cold and the need for food.

A bevy of animals partake in this annual naptime. The bumblebee, ground squirrel, chipmunk, lemur, frog, turtle, toad, skunk, snake, snail, bat, and the brown, black and polar bear are all fans of prolonged respite from their busy lives. Not only our esteemed hibernating weather forecaster, Wiarton Willy, is in tune with Mother Nature’s seasonal fluctuations. In fact, all of these creatures and a good many more have an interior thermostat that lets them know when colder temperatures are on the way and that it’s time to slow down and take an extended rest. Maybe there’s something here for we homosapiens to think about. It’s just possible that hibernation could provide a well needed realigning of the stresses symptomatic of the current human condition.

I don’t want to go overboard with this idea, lest you think me a sleep zealot, so I’m suggesting starting my winters’ snooze in January instead of September or October like other animals. I’m already well on my way in preparation for this undertaking as it is usual before going into hibernation for animals to increase their body fat to survive, which means eating much more than usual in the months leading up to winter. In this regard I have been an ‘A’ student, spending the better part of last summer foraging Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream at our local supermarket, not to mention showing little restraint at the recent blight of potluck parties over the Christmas holidays. I’m more than ready for a bit of a lie down and super excited about the fact that when one emerges from hibernation they are considerably lighter in weight. While doing one of my favourite things (sleeping) I’ll wake up 15 to 27% lighter in body weight than before my head hit the hibernation pillow. Middle of the night trips to the washroom will be completely eliminated, as it is vital for the body to conserve all fluids. And, if you plan things right and take your cue from the bear family, you can actually give birth to and nurse your new little cup while in a deep sleep, not needing to lift a paw until emerging from your den when your new arrival is ready to walk on its own. No middle of the night feedings. I’m having trouble finding a down side.

I say, pull out the onesies, the flannel p.j.’s and your bunny slippers and cuddle up under your favourite feather duvet. Add a good old Canadian Hudson Bay blanket for good measure and dream the winter away. Think of all the money you’ll save on heating and your food bill. You can use the extra dollars to buy the considerably thinner you a new spring wardrobe. Nice.

Janet

 

(Excerpted from Neighbours In The Glen Magazine – Steve Parker, Publisher / sparker@bestversion media.com)